Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Being a perfectionist is tough

I've come to realize I like everything to be as close to perfect as I can get it. Yes, I am a perfectionist. I am not thrilled about this either. Not too long ago I read some words that have stayed with me. I can't seem to get them out of my head. As a perfectionist you can sometimes put off doing things because you don't feel you can give it 110% of yourself. You know you can't do it the way you want it to be done. Oh my how those are such true words for me. I hate that about myself. I hate admitting that about myself.

I have let things in my home go because I know I don't have the time to do them the way I truly want them done. Not good. So now I am going to challenge myself to do a little at a time. It doesn't have to be perfect. I can work on something for 15 minutes and it really doesn't matter if I finish it or not. If it is exactly how I wanted it to come out. Is this going to be easy for me to do? No. I admit that. I accept that. But I WILL do it. I have to do it. Things are taking over my house and I want it back. So time to get rid of it.

After I became a mom 2.5 years ago I learned how to let some things go. I learned that it didn't matter if my house was spotless because I would much rather spend time with my kiddos. But I really hate being a pack rat. I hate clutter. It is driving me nuts. But I just can't seem to get ahead. I can't seem to get myself motivated enough because I know I won't be able to "finish" the job in a day or two. I truly hate this about myself and would love to change it. It also doesn't help that my hubby doesn't really get rid of anything either. He even keeps like every reciept he gets (sorry M!).

When it was just me I could deal with it all. I could go through things easily and deal. But when it became two people to do this for I kind of never learned to deal. I didn't want to upset him or infringe on his privacy. Then it became four and I have totally lost it. I feel like I am drowning half the time. I can't stand it. Must do something about it!